The Colbert Report/Episodes/EpGuide/Episode 460
Production Info Intro Rough Day On The Stock Market * can no longer afford a drum roll ** dropped 678 points! * will face a new shortage ** newspapers will run out of dismayed stock brockers * Dr. Colbert poses so New York Post can have some pictures * it will only effect you if you: ** own a house ** get paid in currency John McCain's Debate * rising cost of planetairum projectors * Michelle Malkin * Andy McCarthy * McCain needs to shape up or he will lose the election ** reptilian James Carville hunts for wet dogs in a burning house * John should take a hint from his running mate and his mate-mate * Cindy McCain is so cold, eskimos have 150 words for her * Bill Ayers has been associated with Dr. Colbert ** shot a member of his audience three times * David Gergen doesn't care about Obama's connection with Bill Ayers ** dir center of public leadership, Kennedy School of Government ** and lesbian meth king! * believes slinging mud is not a good way to win an election * believes people want to hear a positive message ** McCain would get headlines if he said he is positive Obama is a terrorist * blames campaign staff and advisors ** from Bush Administration ** Republican party operatives * months of the campaign are the first months of the administration ** can reflect on leadership * believes McCain should reign in Palin ** mentioned audience members yelled: *** "terrorist" *** "kill him" *** talked trash to a black cameraman ** she speaks for people who have been ignored for a long time ** she is a rabble rouser * Dr. Colbert says move the mudslinging to the Mexican Border ** we could build an adobe wall in no time! Who's Not Honoring Stephen? * Yom Kippur ** why the chosen people need a whole day * Who's Not Honoring Me Now! * MacArthur Foundation ** Jazz musicians blow their money on heroin and berets ** not genius level jazz if it sounds like music * Rock and Roll Hall of Fame ** Stephen & The Colberts are not on it *** forgot about Charlene * a judge called it the catchiest tune he ever admitted into evidence * Stooges have failed at many jobs, but have a great rythm section * Nepal ** named another "Kumari" living goddess ** passed over for a 3-year-old girl * Stephen has the 32 attributes of perfection, which include: ** body like a lion ** thighs like a deer ** stay one night in a room with a dead buffalo and not get scared *** he was in a frat ** Also Stephen will not reach child-bearing age Interview * Oliver Stone ** new movie "W." * Stephen saw it last night and is distributing it online ** very even-handed left-wing nut-job * says the election should be suspended * watches FOX News ** may appear on Bill O'Reilly's show * consider a war against Iran ** maybe Venezuela too * Stephen likes Josh Brolin ** very John Wayne * Stephen likes how it shows how Bush developed into a great man * Stone may be done in Hollywood ** portrayed Bush empathetically ** can't get a date in the 213 area code * Great movie or greatest movie ** greatest movie ever about our greatest president! Epilogue * bad news: good night. Gallery Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Motherload Videos External Tubes *Link Title *Link Title Reviews and Comments